Gazrok
A True Doomsday Prepper
My wife swears by this stuff. We tried it one time, at the Florida State Fair, mostly as a lark, but it worked really really well for her.
http://www.floridasbest.com/product/apr-arthritis-pain-relief-16oz/
http://www.floridasbest.com/product/apr-arthritis-pain-relief-16oz/